TCO Dungeon of Doom

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• (August 06, 2008, 10:47:20 PM)

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BigPimpin
piperspitt
Commissioner D2
Rance Mohammitz
Buddha Dudley
cfones
kingofkings_909

[Daeva]

Did I forget to give Stephanie a co-writing credit? Dammit! 

[Queensryche]

Oh, I forgot to mention in the original post: after you ask your questions and everyone has answered, the current Dungeonmaster gets to score them how they see fit. This allows for different tastes to judge and award the privilege of Dungeonmaster round-to-round.

Also, after this round, and from here on out, the current Dungeonmaster automatically gets a spot in the next panel. So what this means Daeva is that after you rate the answers and name someone the new Dungeonmaster, you're automatically in on the next panel.

[CharismaticZero]

I can sign up for a round, it will give me something else to think about in addition to making random cards.

[Queensryche]

We've got our panelists for this round then. They are:

1. Jokerfish
2. Commissioner D2
3. SmartAssAssassin
4. superradjoe
5. CharismaticZero

Daeva now needs to just post his questions and we can proceed.

[Daeva]

1) Pick a wrestler and dream up a Ben & Jerry's flavor based on that wrestler. Give it a name, tell us what's in it.

2) CZW needs a new specialty match to drum up gate sales. Dream up something innovative that will help them break the $100 gate mark without killing the audience. (They keep getting so close to that $100 mark too!) Make sure to include who would be participating in the match (from any fed, because I don't expect anybody to watch CZW to figure out who their talent is).

3) TNA recently debuted its "open fight night" concept, where new talent can come in and challenge current talent for a spot on the roster. However, this is coming from Hulk Hogan. So, figure out which of his WCW buddies are going to crash TNA next and who they are going to go over. Describe the finish, as well. (Ed Leslie is off-limits. Way too obvious.)

Good luck, have fun!

[superradjoe]

1.  "Cold Stone" Steve Austin.  Birthday cake ice cream with chunks of chocolate covered waffle cone.  Gotta have it!

2.  The Human Pinata match, where they put a person in a custom made poncho filled with candy and hang him above the ring upside down.  The match participants each come to the ring bearing barb wire wrapped baseball bats to try and knock as much candy as possible from the target.  The reason this will attract fans is because the 10 people in attendance will get a shitload of free candy.  And who doesn't love candy?  The match could really be anyone, but I'm thinking a tag team human pinata match between the Brisco Brothers and MCMG with Bobcore Holly as the human pinata.  Who wouldn't want to see Bobcore being beaten with barbed wire bats?

3.  This is really hard as I don't watch TNA nor do I know who is still alive out of Hogan's WCW Buddies.  I think Virgil is going to come and outwrestle Samoa Joe for a spot on the roster.  We will then find Joe selling his autographs at every random convention in the world.

[SmartAssAssassin]

1) Pick a wrestler and dream up a Ben & Jerry's flavor based on that wrestler. Give it a name, tell us what's in it.

2) CZW needs a new specialty match to drum up gate sales. Dream up something innovative that will help them break the $100 gate mark without killing the audience. (They keep getting so close to that $100 mark too!) Make sure to include who would be participating in the match (from any fed, because I don't expect anybody to watch CZW to figure out who their talent is).

3) TNA recently debuted its "open fight night" concept, where new talent can come in and challenge current talent for a spot on the roster. However, this is coming from Hulk Hogan. So, figure out which of his WCW buddies are going to crash TNA next and who they are going to go over. Describe the finish, as well. (Ed Leslie is off-limits. Way too obvious.)

Good luck, have fun!

Woohoo this is gonna be fun!


1.) Brodus Clay's "Somebody Call my Momma Sundae" Chocolate and Vanilla ice cream with rasberry swirls and chunks of real fudge!

2.) Kurt Angle vs Chris Jericho is a "REAL three stages of hell match." It's NO dQ, anything goes, but the rules are as follows. 2 out of 3 falls win. The first fall can only occur if you make your opponent bleed. The 2nd fall (after someone bleeds) is victory by pinfall, and the 3rd fall is by submission. And it has to go in that order. Obviously, if someone were to get the first 2 falls, the match would end there.

3.) Ok, since im kind of in control of this. Hogan's the guy in charge of this angle on TV too, only its kind of a joke. Complaints were made that Hogan was treating younger talent unfair, so he says he's going to hold open tryouts for anybody. He promises a mystery opponent for these jobbers every week, and every week the opponent ends up being Bobby Roode. And every week he just wrecks these guys. This goes on for about a month, until Hogan flat out says "were not gonna just let anybody into this federation. From here on out, its still an open tryout, but the man to beat is Bobby Roode, every week. Bobby comes out, all smiles, and says "Bring on my next victim." The lights dim, then it goes black. All of a sudden, bolts of electricity shoot across the stage, huge pillars of pyro erupt from the floor, and from the back emerges THE SHOCKMASTER!  complete with helmet and cape, and he doesnt even fall this time! He rumbles to the ring, gets in. He stares at Roode, and Roode stares back. Roode trys a quick strike, but its blocked, and the shockmaster throws a right and knocks Roode off his feet. As Roode starts to get up, sloooowly, the shockmaster pulls of his cape (which is a carpet) throws it to the ground, and rubs his feet on it. As Roode reaches a full stand, the shockmaster zaps Roode with a static shock, knocking him to the mat again. The Shockmaster covers Roode and gets the 1-2-3. The crowd is stunned, and just in case anyone thought it hadnt happened yet, TNA just had it's David Arquette moment.

[Jokerfish]

Q1:Lord Tensai's  Asian Mist. French Vanilla Flavored Green Tea Ice cream.
(It represents what WWE thinks of Japanese wrestling. Some White dude doing a water-downed version of it)


Q2:With the Olympics around the corner I would  Diving Board Gauntlet match. The ring would have Diving boards of varying heights  attached to each corner a panel of judges and 10 contestants participating. starts with 2 men in ring. They have 5 minutes to pull of the sickest move off the diving board onto the opponent the person with the highest score moves on to face the next opponent and so forth until one person is victorious. 

Q3:He would bring back The Warrior and Sid Justice to feud with Hogan Saying Hogan is ruining wrestling and that they would put an end to his and Bischoff's regime. This results in an obscene amount 20 minute repetitive garbled promos leading to a Tag match At their version of Wrestlemania(whatever the hell it is called) where no one but Bischoff sells anything, Sid re-breaks his leg, and the match ends in quadruple count out as no one wants to put anyone over. Showing exactly what TNA Higher ups (Hogan/Bischoff) think of their fans

[CharismaticZero]

Q1: I don't often eat ice cream, but when I do, its Alberto del Rio's Dos Caras Vanilla, the least  interesting flavor in the world. Stay boring, my friends.  (Warning: this does not contain anything but vanilla ice cream, and absolutely nothing else.)

Q2: A Texas Tornado Elimination Chamber Match - in this variation on the Elimination Chamber match, there would be 4 teams of 2 members are stuck inside the chamber.  The match would start with 1 wrestlers on each team in the ring, and continue as normal, ending when only one team remains.  In this match you would have: John Cena & Randy Orton (WWE), CM Punk & Daniel Bryan (ROH), Kurt Angle & Christopher Daniels (TNA), and Rob Van Dam & Bully Ray (ECW). 

Q3: Jeff Jarrett will be in the ring and is talking about the success of Ring Ka King, and that talent from their will be brough to the United States to perform for Impact Wrestling, when Sid Viscious walks out, and says that there is plenty of talent here in the US and we dont need any imports, and that he will take on any wrestler that Jarrett chooses from Ring Ka King to prove it.  Sid lock ups with BUlldog hart, and in this back and forth match which showcases high impact power moves, Sid starts to take control early, and locks in the Vicious Crossface early.  Hart manages to  grab the ropes to break the hold, and Sid barely avoids a DQ by continuing to attack him in the  ropes, nearly reaching that five count.  Sid argues with the refree about it, and Hart delivers a
chop block to Sid's ankle.  Sid snaps, grabbing Hart and throwing him into the referee, knocking out the ref.  Jarrett runs down, Sid grabs him and powerbombs him. Sid chokeslams Hart, and seeing no referee, signals for one, and chokeslams Hart again.  After a third chokeslam, he simply sits down on Hart and waits for a referee to count the three. 

He offers an open challenge to anyone in "Ring Ka Krap" to come to America and see if they can stop him.   After doing so, he picks Hart one more time and delivers a powerbomb to him, leaving him lying in the ring.

[Commissioner D2]

1)  OFFICIAL PRESS RELEASE
BEN & JERRY'S TO DEVOTE NEW FLAVORS TO "SUMMER OF PUNK"

In response to the overwhelming request across the globe for WWE to bring back their Ice Cream Bars, and the people of Good Humor deciding to not see the Good Money in fulfilling that demand, we at Ben & Jerry's reached out to WWE SUPERSTAR and CURRENT WWE CHAMPION CM PUNK and asked him to decide the new flavor for this summer's line.  He responded with not one, not two, but THREE new flavors, each to debut this summer!

First we have the flavor inspired by his good friend COLT "BOOM BOOM" CABANA.  Named "BOOM BOOM BUTTER PECAN", this delicious flavor combines our delicious Butter Pecan ice cream with chunks of malted milk balls, which have been soaked in a special Colt 45 mixture made just for us!

Next, a very special flavor for the vegan in us all.  Named after fellow former WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION DANIEL BRYAN (or for those who respect the independent scene, BRYAN "THE AMERICAN DRAGON" DANIELSON), "THE FINAL COUNTDOWN" gives us a delicious blend of non-dairy vanilla ice cream, with pieces of apple crumble mixed in.  A personal favorite of the American Dragon himself!

Finally, the flavor designed for CM PUNK himself.  Named "BEST IN THE WORLD", this phenomenal blend of our signature chocolate ice cream brings in elements of some of our most popular flavors.  Chunks of white and dark chocolate brownie, huge pieces of cherries, and a good helping of walnuts all come together to provide what is sure to be the Best In The World.


2)  A true Stairway To Hell match.  To take place during Cage of Death.  MASADA has been on a tear all year since winning the CZW World Championship from Scotty Vortekz.  Open challenge after open challenge has been issued, and the result has always been the same.  Finally, the man who lost the belt in the first place, Scotty Vortekz, returns.  The  challenge is set.  This year, the Cage of Death will be designed similar to the Hell In A Cell build.  A cage surrounding ringside with a roof.  On top of that roof sits two ladders.  And hanging above it all is the CZW World Heavyweight Championship.  Various weapons are both inside and surrounding the cell.  Tables stacked 5 high are on various sides outside the cage.  The object is simple.  You have to find a way to escape the cell, climb to the top, set up the ladder, climb, and retrieve the title.  The danger factor here is HUGE!!  Exactly what CZW fans want.


3)  Brian Knobbs returns and challenges Janet in make-up.  Everybody is confused, but Hogan allows it.  Knobbs trips getting into the ring and lands on Janet, and the ref counts it.

[Buddha Dudley]

I'd like to throw my hat in next round now that all 5 of the latest entrants have submitted their entries.

[Daeva]

I'll do scoring later tonight, but I do want to say to all of the entrants: a 1 doesn't mean that your response was bad, because they all at least made me smile. It just means that the other guys' responses were funnier.

[Daeva]

Double-posting for visibility (and because I can), it's time to tally the scores!

Question 1 (My answer: Delirious' "Bah Bah Bahhhhhhh!" flavor, which is different in every container. You never know what the hell you're going to bite into!)

superradjoe: 2 (Nice Coldstone Creamery reference, and there's nothing wrong with birthday cake ice cream, but it doesn't really capture the Bionic Redneck.)
SmartAssAssassin: 3 (Good laugh, good flavor, just got beat out by the other two.)
Jokerfish: 5 (Poignant, topical, and the ice cream would probably be pretty good.)
CharismaticZero: 1 (You could have taken this further, but it was good for a chuckle and a smile.)
Commissioner D2: 4 (These are all very nice, but Colt .45 in ice cream?! Come on! Malt liquor has no place in a frozen food!)

Question 2 (My answer: the Shark Tank match, where two guys grapple over an open-topped shark tank with a hole in the middle of the scaffold (to hide the plexiglas tube for the wrestler to fall into when he's "eaten by sharks". Obviously, the contenders are Typhoon and Shark Boy!)

superradjoe: 5 (Sick, depraved, and free candy: this fits the CZW audience to a tee.)
SmartAssAssassin: 1 (Angle can't do ultraviolence, Raw Deal persona or not. The fans would get bored with the absolute technical clinic that this match would entail because after someone bleeds, the rest of the stips are pretty generic. Doing a submission match in a Hardcore fed will get you booed out of the building [see also: Cactus Jack using headlocks in ECW]. I, however, would watch it, but someone has to be on the bottom.)
Jokerfish: 2 (This was tough, because I actually think that this would go over really well in CZW until someone misjudges their jump and pancakes a fan.)
CharismaticZero: 4 (Elimination Chamber is more elaborate and there are lots of ways for this to get bloody fast, especially with the talent that you picked. Orton probably won't bleed, though.)
Commissioner D2: 3 (You got edged out by the Elimination Chamber match, even if this match is just SCREAMING for a sick ladder spot into some tables.)

Question 3 (My answer: Lex Luger winning the belt from Robert Roode, in spite of [or BECAUSE of] the fact that he's in no medical condition to wrestle.)

superradjoe: 3 (I can see Joe sitting in the convention center, and I can't stop grinning about it.)
SmartAssAssassin: 5 (I laughed out loud at this for a full minute. It was simply amazing.)
Jokerfish: 4 (Warrior and Sid together would make the most rambling, incoherent promos on Earth, and everyone would love it, including me.)
CharismaticZero: 2 (Great story about Sid, the others just grabbed me more.)
Commissioner D2: 1 (There's nothing funny about the Nasty Boys, except that they think that they have talent.)

TOTALS

superradjoe: 10
SmartAssAssassin: 9
Jokerfish: 11
CharismaticZero: 7
Commissioner D2: 8

Jokerfish, a winner is you! I'm in on the next panel, so who wants to smell what Jokerfish is cooking with me?

[Queensryche]

The next panel is as follows:

Daeva (automatic qualifier)
do0shebag55

We need three more!

And for the scoreboard so far:

Daeva/Jokerfish: 11 points
Antigoth/superradjoe: 10 points
Homeless/Jypsy/SmartAssAssassin: 9 points
Commissioner D2: 8 points
CharismaticZero: 7 points
Dilbert: 6 points

[superradjoe]

So....close....

EDIT:  I was having trouble with Question #1 so the copy of WWF Attitude sitting to my right (yes, I have a PS1 copy of it on my desk right now) with Stone Cold's shiny bald head gave me the thought.

[dilbert505]

What the hell, I'll give it another go. Time to defend my last place standing!

[kbjone]

I'll claim second-to-last entry (and likely second-to-last place).

[BigPimpin]

Sure, sign me up

[Queensryche]

Alright then, our panelists this round are:

Daeva
do0shebag55
dilbert505
kbjone
BigPimpin

Now we just need Jokerfish to post his questions.

[Homeless]

i'll do the round after this. the 4th round.

[Antigoth]

i'll do the round after this. the 4th round.

CARP!

I want back in too... I've got a second place that I want to try and overcome.

[superradjoe]

If we're doing pre-emptive signups... count me in for #4.

[Jokerfish]

question 1:As I was watching Are You Serious,a web WWE series about bad moments in WWE.
It got me to thinking about Bad Gimmicks such as Power Cat and Phantasmo. If you could repackage any Main event/mid card talent into a Bad gimmick who would it be what would they be called and what would their finisher be?

Question 2:if you could have a dream date with a female wrestler past or present where would you go and how would it turn out?

Question3:  If you could make an impassioned plea to the major wrestling companies about one topic in the hopes that they would take your advice. What would be the topic and who would be listening. 

[kbjone]

question 1:As I was watching Are You Serious,a web WWE series about bad moments in WWE.
It got me to thinking about Bad Gimmicks such as Power Cat and Phantasmo. If you could repackage any Main event/mid card talent into a Bad gimmick who would it be what would they be called and what would their finisher be?

Question 2:if you could have a dream date with a female wrestler past or present where would you go and how would it turn out?

Question3:  If you could make an impassioned plea to the major wrestling companies about one topic in the hopes that they would take your advice. What would be the topic and who would be listening. 

1: It's gotta be the Big Show.

He'll come out one Smackdown, and say he's had ENOUGH of the crap the WWE has saddled him with the past dozen years. As revenge, he'll make everyone else suffer as he "brings back" Captain Insano.

Finisher: He grabs a mic, and screams enough gibberish/random words to make his opponent run away in fear of their mental state. Counters will include earmuffs/plugs and cutting the mic. It'll be called the Sanity Blast.

2: I'm bringing Molly Holly to a very nice restaurant, followed by a romantic movie of her choice. The night ends with a chaste kiss on the cheek, because I have NO chance in hell of going any further on the first date.

(... and praying I can make it to a second/third/etc... date...)

3: I guess I'd be talking to Dixie Carter, BEGGING her to stop trying to be WWE2, and bring in someone "old school", someone willing to actually promote WRESTLING over ENTERTAINMENT.

I wouldn't expect to succeed... but damnit, someone has to try.

[Buddha Dudley]

question 1:As I was watching Are You Serious,a web WWE series about bad moments in WWE.
It got me to thinking about Bad Gimmicks such as Power Cat and Phantasmo. If you could repackage any Main event/mid card talent into a Bad gimmick who would it be what would they be called and what would their finisher be?

Question 2:if you could have a dream date with a female wrestler past or present where would you go and how would it turn out?

Question3:  If you could make an impassioned plea to the major wrestling companies about one topic in the hopes that they would take your advice. What would be the topic and who would be listening. 

1.) I would repackage Delirious and create the Ultimatest Warrior. I can't think of a better person to fit the gimmick, aside from Delirious not being roided out and blown up 5 min. into a match. I get giddy thinking of the nonsensical promos and references that Delirious can actually pull off. His finisher would be Ultimate Shadows of Hell (Shaking of the Ropes into the Gorilla Press into the Splash on the Back)

2.) I would go on the dream date with Saturyne from CHIKARA. I just want to tell her to her mask that my weakness is a fine honey with a fat ass, the resulting slap would be worth it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U0RIAVg8hng#t=02m28s

Saturyne in the Briscoes match at 42s in to the video.

3.) I would beg Steph and Paul to actually cater more to the hardcore fans like us. WWE crushed the hearts of smarks by making Danielson lose in seconds and catered to them by giving Punk a mic. It's like they're trolling the marks, but at least they're acknowledging the existense of marks. Zack Ryder getting wrestling time solely off his youtube series is good for wrestling. WWE is better off acknowledging that there is smart marks and booking with them in mind than trying to keep kayfabe. It would at least keep the internet dorks buzzing and more forgiving about PGWWE (I originally had a much longer version of kbjone's #3 but he beat me to it)

"There is no wealth like knowledge, no poverty like ignorance." - Ali ibn Abi-Talib